A good quote can do wonders for someone’s mood. Especially when it seems to be speaking to you. Use these quotes to get you through the week if you find yourself in a fearless slump!
Which mantra is your favorite? Or what do you do when you need to refuel your fearlessness? Let me know in the comments…
Last Sunday, I had the pleasure of participating in the Crafther Market in Austin, Tx at the Fair Market.It was for small businesses that offer handcrafted items.This meant that I would only be able to offer my handcrafted pieces from the Fashion Not Fear Collection.The women behind the market was described as, “A biannual pop-up space, showcasing the talent of women and non-binary makers, creators, and artists in Texas.”
After loading up the car with dresses, clothing racks, decor items and more….my niece and I took the short drive from San Antonio to Austin to pop up at this fabulous event!Upon arrival, I could immediately tell that it was going to be a good day.First off, I didn’t spend the first 20 minutes wandering around looking for the creator of the event to check in and find my space.Nope.There was a beautiful lady standing right at the entrance with clipboard in hand, ready to check me in and show me my space.That was easy!Normally, I have to not only search for someone but I also have to ask some of the other attendees what the person looks like or what they are wearing because I have no idea.
Not only did they make that part easy but there were so many people offering to help us to get things out of the car into the building. In all of the other events, I’ve participated in, all of the transferring from car to space and setting up is all on you.To be honest, this is probably my biggest obstacle when I’m setting up a pop up shop.In most cases, my fiancé is able to come help me set everything up (as long as he doesn’t have to work.)But if he has to work that day, it’s all on me!When I’m setting up alone, Im so super sweaty and frustrated by the time I’m done.That is definitely not the right head space to be in when connecting with new people.This time though, I waslucky enough to have the help of the market staff but my niece was there too…thank God!
After everything was set up and ready to go it finally hit me…
THESE PEOPLE ARE GOING TO BE SHOPPING garment THAT YOU MADE WITH YOUR OWN HANDS, YOUR STYLES. Am I ready for this?Can I do this?What if people don’t like it??What if the clothes fall apart when they try them on?Are you crazy, Kristie???
This went on for about 45 minutes after they opened the doors to let shoppers in. As people walked in and out of my area, the fear became worse and worse.It was pretty ridiculous.Until I made my first sale. Here is how it happened:A shopper picks up the Floreal Top and says, “love this print”, “thank you”; I replied.“Do you mind if I try it on?; “Not at all” I replied.I nervously take it off the hanger and hand it to her.She tries it on and says; “I love it! I’ll take it!”
That was all it took.I told fear to, “kiss my ass, I got this!”And that’s exactly what happened.Women were not only buying Fashion Not Fear, but they were complimenting the fabric choices, saying things like, “Can’t believe you made this” and more.The feedback was incredible.
The rest of the day seemed to fly by!Although my two glasses of red wine didn’t hurt.🤷🏽♀️ It funny how each time I receive a request to order a dress through the online store, I get so excited! But it’s hard to find out their thoughts of the piece when they receive it if they don’t leave a review or reply to my ‘How was your order?’ email. The face to face instant reaction was just what I needed. Thoughts of these women walking around Austin wearing my dresses and tees was probably the best feeling ever.
On the ride home, I analyzed how everything went. I was disappointed that I left fear creep in and let me think that I wasn’t meant to be doing what I’m doing. But felt grateful that I didn’t let it stop me. Or make me pack up early and run home. (I thought about it.)Imagine that. Me. Kristie. The dress boutique owner who raves about being fearless and created a damn dress line called Fashion Not Fear…still deals with fear? Yes, I do! Like I’ve said, being a fearless woman doesn’t mean you won’t be scared of shit. It just means you are willing to fight through it to get to it. Whatever your it is.
I enjoyed meeting lots of fearless women who were working hard to create their own lane. So, what did I learn? So much! But mainly…I discovered some design details that I need to focus on. And that everyone isn’t going to get it and that’s okay. I also got another experience in saying; “Fuck you!” to fear.
Needless say that the girl power in the building was off the chains! Overall, I am beyond excited about to improve my designs, processes, and to make Fashion Not Fear the first brand that pops in your head when you’re in need of a great dress.
So, until next year Crafther Market and the over 3,800 people who came out to support.Thanks for the love!Thoughts??Let me know in the comments.
Being fearless is a way of life. It’s like exercising, learning a new task, being in a relationship or anything else. You have to put in the effort and work all of the time if you expect to see results.
Its like being happy everyday. You can find any reason to get upset and be irritated all day. Thats easy. It takes real effort to wake up everyday and make it your goal to be happy and not let outside influences put you in a bad mood, right?
All of this can sound easier said then done especially when your morning consisted of being stuck in traffic, wasting coffee on your ‘fit on the way into work, and your bae deciding to pick an argument before you have even left the house. We all have had those types of mornings. We are human.
So, how’s a girl stay full of fearless throughout the day with all of these shananigans going on?? Check out these techniques you can use when your fearless tank is on empty.
When you are in your grind, there are times when the days go by so fast that you can’t even remember what day it is! Being that exhausted is tough but instead of focusing on that; focus on why you are doing it. It will put more gas in your fearless tank.
4. Sweat It Off
Exercise is the one of the best stress relievers. If you are a consistent reader, then you know that this is said ALL OF THE TIME on Fashion Not Fear. But it’s true, take a walk when feeling overloaded and see how great you will feel.
Setting boundaries is essential when living the fearless life. Without setting boundaries with family and friends, how will you have time to pursue your fearlessness? They mean well, but if they aren’t in their fearless journey then they might not be able to relate. The only thing not setting boundaries will do is lead to you feeling overwhelmed. Trust me. Even if it’s, no calls until after 5pm. They will understand.
6. Never Say “No” To A New Opportunity
Working with new people or saying “yes” to new opportunities may sound scary. No, let’s be honest…it is scary! Something amazing could happen or something horrible may come from it. But how will you know; if you don’t try?
7. Seek inspiration
A quote, a Fearless Woman video, whatever it takes to help give you that boost!
8. Get Away For A Refresher
You don’t have to break the bank to get away. A day trip is a great reboot.
10. Create a list of goals along with dates that they should be completed by
Anything worth having is not going to be easy. If that were the case, we would all be doing exactly what we wanted with no fear at all….am i right?! These 10 tips will should help to fill up your fearless tank. Thoughts on these tips?? Let me know in the comments…
I am a relationship authority and help both men and women with this. Many years back I left my then Narcissistic relationship after marrying at age 21 years. To ensure you do find that perfect match you must set a criteria, without a criteria you are running blind and wasting time. We need to know what it is we want and need in a partner.
Once the criteria is set, this can sometimes be a challenge in itself, you can determine quickly f this person satisfies that criteria. May sound too logical when we speak of love however, there must be chemistry, of course.
I met my husband 18 years ago and from the first evening we met I went through via non-confronting questions to ascertain if this was worth investing or persuing. We fell in love almost immediately as he clearly satisfied all my criteria plus some. We have been gloriously happy, remaining in our love bubble for the past 18 years. I remember exactly that night we met and his smile that melted my heart, and still does.
Bernie Giggins; 58 & husband Laurie; 60
I met my husband, Laurie, when I was a Women’s Royal Australian Naval dental assistant back on 1st May 1980, he was one of the many sailor patient’s. I really liked him and would stuff up wisdom teeth x-rays for him so he had to return and have them re-done, I was a competent radiographer but pretended I botched them.
I don’t think he knew I liked him and eventually we went on a date later on, to see The Rocky Horror Movie together.
There was something about his smile and the way he spoke that touched my heart, six weeks later asked me to marry him as he was going to be leaving on a 4 month navy patrol trip, two weeks later. We kept it quiet, just in case we weren’t the right match. I wrote to him every day over that time and we surprised everyone at my 21st birthday when we announced our engagement.
We married in 1982, have had three amazing children, who have married their soul mates and now have six gorgeous grandchildren . This year we have been together 38 amazing years!
-Bernie Giggins
Jodie Guerrero & her husband
We had a long distance relationship via pen, paper and telephone, spending only 4 weeks together; in person before tying the knot. After meeting my beau (Greg) in my church kitchen, we started pen paling, way back in 1994. From his home in San Francisco & my home in Brisbane, Australia – he started calling me. Then one day, he called back a 2nd time and said ‘I can’t help it, I’m in love with you’!!We both met each other’s parents/family.On my SF trip, he got down on one knee under an ornamental bridge inside San Francisco’s famous ‘Japanese Tea Gardens’.
We had eleven months to plan an Australian ‘country themed’ wedding. It was now, April (1997). Our reception was held amongst the horses, cows and sheep. I was 25 and husband was 27.We’ve been married now for over 20 years!! He is still devoted to me and we are very much in love.
Thoughts on these amazing love stories?? Let me know in the comments…
We have been on a serious Confidence Campaign. Why? Well, because confidence is the key to everything especially being fearless. Which is why its necessary to share tips with anyone who will listen (or read)!
We asked Mom and Mentor, Katinda Ndola her thoughts on confidence.
The secret to or key to confidence is something right in front of us. When I start to slide into fear of not being enough and the negative voices in my head start to talk I use a powerful mantra to remind myself that I have something special and I have greatness within me.
Katina Ndola – @katinda_ndola
These 3 words “I AM ENOUGH” changed the trajectory of my life and when I discovered how much power they had I cried in disbelief. I have a business that focuses on women’s confidence and self-esteem and always do a FREE 7 day challenge on confidence and reveal the powerful mantra. In the 7 day I am Enough challenge I get the women to write I Am Enough on all their mirrors at home in bright red lipstick as a reminder that they are enough.
I even suggest creating a screen saver, making a song for your ringtone, putting sticky notes with I Am Enough everywhere. My business focuses on mentoring /coaching women on confidence and also I am a motivational speaker and we do workshops too.
Red lipstick on the mirror doesn’t sound like a bad idea at all. Thoughts on Katindas’ confidence tips?? Let me know in the comments…
Confidence is so important. Without it; you might find everything difficult from going out on dates to doing a speech in front a small crowd. I’ve read stories about women who’s confidence is so low that they rarely leave the house. Some even hate looking at themselves in the mirror.
Fashion Not Fear isn’t just about being fearless in fashion. It’s about being fearless and confidence in life each and every day. With every single thing we do. No matter how much you have accomplished or what daily mantras you say to yourself…working on being confident in yourself is just what I said….WORK!! But it doesn’t have to be so difficult.
In our quest to help you to live as fearlessy and confident as possible. We found it necessary to reach to women all over the world to see just how they handle being confident.
Tami Matheny is author of; “The Confident Athlete: 4 Easy Steps To Build And Maintain Confidence.” and owner of Refuse To Lose Coaching. We reached out to this confidence connoisseur to hear her thoughts…
Use “I am…” statements. Ex. “I am pretty” “I am confident” “I am strong” “I am smart” Saying this statement is most effective when repeated over and over. Do a Wonder Woman Pose- getting your body into a strong confident position for several minutes automatically increases confidence. I suggest starting the day with this pose and then using before an important date, meeting, etc.
– Tami Matheny
Tami took it a step further by providing a 30 day calendar that will give you daily tips that will help to build up your confidence.
This calendar can be used for any month. Download it and get back to me on how it works out for you. Thoughts on Tami’s tips, calendar or like to share a tip of your own?? Let me know in the comments…
Part of living fearlessy is confidence. As a matter of fact, 99% of being a fearless woman is having confidence in yourself and your abilities. Because whether or not other people think you can achieve something means absolutely nothing. At the end of it all, it all comes down to you. If YOU don’t believe it, you won’t achieve it. I truly believe that. This is why I feel confidence is key when it comes to your fearless journey.
You can be the most confident woman in the world but there will come a time when you have a down day. It’s totally normal. Would you agree? That is why I reached out to other women to see what they do to build up their confidence. The response was so overwhelming that I decided to break in down into a mini series. These woman had some awesome words of confidence t share. And I didn’t want you to miss any of them. Take a look at what these everyday women had to say when asked, “What makes you feel confident?”
“I wake up around 6:30am, stumble into the kitchen for my first cup of joe. First things first. That sets the tone. I sit at the kitchen table at 7am and think about all of the good things in my life. Write them down and show real, genuine gratitude for them. …another tip is a gratitude journal, and not just the I’m thankful for this and that, but ADDING 10 new things to an ever growing list every single day. It trains you to see the good, and because of that, creates amazing days. I PREACH to do it in the morning instead of before you go to bed for this very reason. These are all things that not only help you be a morning person, but make you EXCITED to live your day, and even better, excited to live your LIFE! :)” – Martha Krejci, Co-Founder and CEO of TribeFinder
“For me confidence does not come from a dress, something I have to do or from anything outside of myself. What I have learned over the years and what I am still learning, is that presence is key. In other words: connecting with my body and having a relationship with myself. The more present I am, so my mind and body with what I am doing and not wondering off and checking out to the past or future, the more confident I feel. When I am with myself, simply being me, I feel a sense of knowing that whatever is in front of me, I can handle. Why? Because I am present with it. My body knows what to do next.”
– Mariette Reineke, Journalist/Blogger
I am a closest introvert. People don’t realise how shy I really am. I have lots of tricks that I have used to overcome my shyness. “Fake it to you make it” does work. I visualise myself as confidence. I used hypnosis and guided meditations for confidence. I started was in high school and it really helped and now I have become a hypnotherapist myself and have developed an app that had just been released. Hypnotherapy, Mindfulness and Meditation do work to gain confidence and a better self image and can help you become more confident and step out of your introvert shell. Body language is very important and adapting stances can make a big different. When you are lacking confided or feeling nervous change your body posture – do a victory pose or wonder women pose and it can change you physiology, mood and mindset. The photo above is of a surprise party for me. I was so nervous I did not want to enter on seeing a group of people with cameras all faced at me! My first instinct was to run away but knowing my training I knew I had to do the victory pose and embrace the moment and it worked.
– Eugenie Pepper, Author of KEY MINDFULNESS – THE KEY FOR ME
Thoughts on their awesome tips? Or do you have a confidence tip to share?? Let me know in the comments. Stay tuned for the next set of ladies!
CJ Scarlet knows first-hand how violence can destroy lives. As a survivor of sexual assault, CJ spent years dealing with the emotional aftermath. After taking her power back, she became an advocate for others who had been victimized, running a child advocacy center and serving as Director of Victims Issues for the NC Attorney General’s Office.
CJ decided to use her hard-won experience and knowledge to pen The Badass Girl’s Guide: Uncommon Strategies to Outwit Predators, the definitive guide on self-empowerment and self-defense for women and girls. From tips on how to “fail” the predator interview and avoid being targeted, to instructions on using your personal bodily “weapons” to defend yourself in a confrontation, this edgy book offers everything you need to know to stay safe, fight if you must and navigate the criminal justice process if the worst happens.
CJ decided to take her experience and wrote a book entitled, The Badass Girl’s Guide: Uncommon Strategies To Outwit Predators. Which tackles the main reason women and girls are so vulnerable to assault—their life-long socialization to “make nice” and their fear of appearing rude, which make them a perfect target for predators.
This award-winning writer and motivational speaker has given speeches and workshops at national and international events, appeared on numerous radio and television programs, including MSNBC and NPR. She has been named one of the “Happy 100” people on the planet, and her personal story of how she triumphed over her victimizations and a terminal medical diagnosis is featured in the bestselling books, Happy for No Reason and Be Invincible.
While you might be fearless, you’re only human, and we all have areas where we lack confidence. In particular, we often have fashion fears that hold us back due to the fear of what the outside world might think.
Indeed, we often feel shy or at least reluctant to truly stand out from the crowd in terms of our outfits, yet there are two fundamental principles that mean you can have more confidence in your personal style no matter what you’re wearing or what situation you find yourself in.
Confidence is like a snowball, in that, the more confidence you have the more confident you become, and whilst confidence is something internal, dressing well is like wrapping up a precious gift… the most important thing is the gift that’s inside, not how it’s packaged, but does the packaging affect the way people view and respond to the gift that’s inside? You bet.
Therefore, it’s important we come across well – but what’s more important is that we are comfortable and confident in our own personal style; and there are two core areas that you want to look at in this realm; the first it to pick clothes that express your unique personality in the sense they are focused on your own personal tastes, and secondly, ensure you are dressed in a way that allows you to relax and be comfortable in your environment.
FOCUS ON YOUR OWN TASTES
Try not to be swept up with current fashion trends as these are ever changing and subject to the opinion of the masses – rather than your own personal opinion. Make sure you choose clothes that you, personally, love. Don’t rely on someone else’s opinion. Have an opinion of your own and flesh out your wardrobe on the basis of what you like. If you want to wear a name necklace then wear a name necklace. Your fashion is your own unique choice, it should be up to you what you want to wear, not dictated by fashion magazines or peers.
RELAX AND BE COMFORTABLE
You don’t want to feel uptight about what you’re wearing. Imagine, going to the gym, and knowing that your t-shirt is a little too small so that when you put your hands above your head, the base of the t-shirt rises, revealing your stomach. The key point is that you want to feel relaxed and comfortable in what you’re wearing – try to avoid clothes that might be super fashionable but make it hard to move or just make you feel uncomfortable.
So, there are the two fundamental principles to having more confidence in your unique style – dress in a way that expresses who you are according to your tastes (rather than following the fashion lemmings) and make sure what you’re wearing is comfortable enough to allow you to relax and be the person you truly are.
Remember, you are unique. Just like your fingerprints or DNA, nobody is the same as you, therefore you were born to stand out not blend in. Have confidence in yourself and embrace your uniqueness.
Natalie Scanlon started an international writing business from her bed, while battling post natal depression. Her company has grown so fast that is has helped her to overcome an intense time of depression. She now owns a booming company that services people located all over the world.
Natalie wanted to share her fearless journey in hopes of helping someone else. Take a look…
